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Want a good relationship with your indoor plants? Try some advice from 'Houseplant Hookups' - NOLA.com

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Just in time to help a new fall crop of dorm- and first-time apartment dwellers (but still relevant to many others, no doubt) comes “Houseplant Hookups: All the Dirt You Need to Find the Perfect Match.” The cheeky premise presents plant characteristics in the form of dating profiles. And author and plant authority Agatha Isabel promises that there’s a perfect plant partner out there for each of us.

Swipe through the 35 plant profiles to find both their attractive features and their toxic traits. Or maybe you should take the compatibility quiz at the end of the book first. Either way, you will be charmed by the humor; the metaphor, which is surprisingly apt; and the colorful illustrations by Mai Ly Degnan.

plant book cover.jpg

But make no mistake: Tucked in amid the clever writing there’s plenty of solid plant information, and it’s all very easy to understand — even for inexperienced gardeners (or no-experience gardeners). So, for busy young people who want a touch of green to warm up cinder-block walls but fear commitment, this book is for you.

In the first pages, Isabel walks us through layers of decision-making. First comes evaluating what we bring to the table physically. I know what you’re thinking after all this talk of dating profiles, but she’s referring to light conditions, temperature and your space’s general vibe.

“Be realistic about each other’s needs,” she advises.

Do you want to look for hot singles in your area (big box stores with plants or dedicated nurseries) or do you prefer online contacts? There are tips for doing both successfully.

And then it’s on to the individual plants. Even if the dating-app style starts to wear thin, the solid info will carry you though.

Each profile starts with an itemized list of requirements for the plant to thrive. Light needs (low to bright, indirect to direct); water (low to high and well-drained); humidity (low, normal to high); temperature (low, average or high); and — this is smart — a difficulty rating on whether the plant is low-maintenance (level 1) or needs more care (up to 3).

Looking for something easy? You could just scan those introductory lists, put the book aside and head to the plant store.

About a half-dozen of the 35 varieties included seem to be lack-of-green-thumb proof: That is, they can take low light, normal humidity, average temperatures and have a difficulty rating of 1. 

Seems like there really may be a perfect plant partner for us all.  

"Houseplant Hookups All the Dirt you Need to Find the Perfect Match" By Agatha Isabel; illustrated by Mai Ly Degnan; Gibbs Smith Publishers, $19.99.

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