They ended up working through things but it was difficult to move on from what had happened, especially because everyone under the sun knew.
3. Making jokes at your partner’s expense.
At university, I started dating a guy who seemed extremely nice at first. A few weeks after we had been together he began to constantly make jokes about my clothes.
"Why don’t you wear more designer clothing... do you even own more than a couple of pairs of jeans?" he asked, and I instantly felt self-conscious and so embarrassed.
I was in classes full time plus working to pay for uni and I didn’t have the newest or most fashionable clothes.
Needless to say, that put a wrench in our relationship and things fizzled out shortly after.
4. Expecting your partner to read your mind.
One night after my parents' divorce had been finalised I spent the evening with my mother. Throughout the evening, she kept complaining about how my father had never done what she wanted.
"Did you ever tell Dad what you wanted?" I asked her.
She paused and looked confused. "No, but he should have known after knowing me for more than half of our lives."
I carried this belief into my relationships for a long time until I finally realised it was absolute insanity. How on earth can you expect another person to know exactly what you’re thinking?
Relationships almost never end because of a huge event. They end due to the small things that build up over the years.
After watching my parents I realised that I didn’t want to end up with the same fate and worked very hard to ensure that my partner and I communicate as much as we possibly can.
My older brother and I often joke that sometimes we can learn the most when we are accidentally taught what not to do.
Relationships are delicate and we have to be aware of our actions even if they seem small.
It’s important to remember that the real damage is usually done slowly, over a lifetime, not in a single event.
Feature Image: Getty. The feature image used is a stock image.
This post first appeared on Medium and has been republished here with full permission.
Carrie Wynn writes to provide education on what emotional and narcissistic abuse looks like, how to cultivate a healthy relationship, and how you can work to realise your self-worth. You can find her on Instagram, or her blog here.
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